How well do you know yourself?
One of the biggest struggles people have is they lack self-awareness, which is an essential skill for anyone wanting to grow in their position as leader.
Being self-aware means understanding how temperament, strengths, weaknesses and behaviour impact others, which is far more complicated than you think. Many people mask or hide certain aspects of who they are which prevents true self-awareness.
In this article, I am asking four questions to help you start becoming more self-aware and to achieve better results as a leader.
How do you deal with feedback?
Being aware of your reactions towards receiving feedback is essential when leading a team. Becoming defensive or denying you have made a mistake sets a poor example for your team, who needs to know they will be supported when mistakes are made or when they have something important, yet difficult to share. Leaders must listen with an open mind and respond with curiosity. Furthermore, as hard as it is, admitting mistakes gains respect and encourages team members to admit their own mistakes.
It you are unsure how others perceive you, ask and then be prepared to openly listen and encourage further dialogue. If you fall prey to defensiveness learn to deal with criticism in a positive way.
Are you good with conflict?
Learning how to handle conflict is not easy. It can be hard since we haven’t been taught how to have difficult conversations in the right way. Instead, we use ineffective strategies we learned growing up.
When conflict arises, you may be tempted to:
- shut it down by imposing your authority,
- walk away without having any conversation,
- smooth it over instead of addressing the problem, or
- get angry.
Since conflict is not about right or wrong and is about understanding and appreciating differences, I suggest you:
- get the dialogue started quickly,
- be curious about what you hear, and share your viewpoint openly and honestly.
Are you able to change when needed?
As you become more self-aware and identify changes needing to be made, be prepared to adapt your behaviour accordingly which will take time and effort. Self-awareness means nothing if you don’t take action toward positive change. After all, the purpose of being self-awareness is to identify what can make us better human beings and then change accordingly.
Adjusting behaviour doesn’t happen overnight and requires intentional thought and action. So, it may be helpful to ask a colleague to point out times when you are falling into past behaviours and to help you evaluate conversations/situations as they happen.
What are your strengths?
Behaviour assessments such as Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) or Clifton Strength-Finder, helps identify primary strengths of individuals and differences that exist. They encourage personal insight into how we think and behave including the good, bad and ugly. Assessment tools are an excellent way to begin understanding yourself better and to build appreciation amongst your team as they look at ways they complement one another.
Self-awareness is an important skill to learn. It requires knowledge and a fearless commitment to look deeply into your strengths and weaknesses with a determination to become a better version of yourself. Individuals who expose themselves to this level of self-scrutiny grow as individuals and make better leaders.